Finding Balance Between Being Human and Being Spiritual

“You can’t expect therapists to help heal trauma and then not speak out against the systems that are causing collective trauma on a massive scale in real time.” — Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy

I've been sitting with this quote I recently came across on social media, and what it brings up for me. As a therapist and a healer, how do I understand my relationship to the world around me? Where does my work end, and where does my responsibility to speak up begin?

I've heard different perspectives in both the therapist world and the healer and spiritual world. Some believe we should remain neutral and avoid getting involved in politics. Is it our place to speak up? Could doing so affect our healing spaces or our energy in ways that aren't helpful? Is part of being spiritually evolved or enlightened learning to rise above what's happening in the world, rather than getting caught up in its pain and conflict?

Others believe our work as therapists and healers is connected to addressing harm beyond the individual. If the systems we live in contribute to people's suffering, can we truly support healing while ignoring those systems? Is speaking up against oppression and collective harm part of our responsibility?

I don't have all the answers. But I know that, for me, this isn't an abstract question.

My training as a marriage and family therapist taught me to look beyond the individual and consider the systems shaping their lives. Before becoming a therapist, and in my work since becoming a therapist, I have see how systems can create barriers and cause harm.

These systems affect my own life, too. Oppression and collective trauma aren't things I can view from a distance; they touch my life, the people I love, and the people I work with. To ignore their impacts would be to ignore parts of my own lived experience and the experiences of my clients.

So when I think about healing, I can't separate what's happening within a person from the world they have to move through.

At the same time, my spiritual life matters deeply to me. I know what it feels like to become consumed by anger, fear, or grief about what's happening in the world. When I get caught there, I can lose connection with myself, with my soul, and with the part of me that wants to meet life with love and compassion.

In spiritual spaces, I've heard the invitation to stay in a higher vibration, to focus on love, and to trust that our spiritual practices can help support the collective. I understand the value of this. I believe in tending to our inner lives. I believe in compassion, gratitude, and the ways our presence can affect the people around us.

But I also wonder: When does trying to rise above the pain of the world become a way of disconnecting from our humanity?

I don't want to be so consumed by suffering that I lose my connection to spirit. And I don't want to be so focused on staying spiritually connected that I turn away from the suffering around me.

I'm still figuring out what that balance looks like.

Staying connected to both

For me, being spiritually connected doesn't mean I have to be untouched by what's happening in the world. I can feel sadness, anger, and heartbreak. I can acknowledge that something is unjust. I can care about people who are being harmed. Those feelings don't necessarily mean I've lost my spiritual connection. They are part of being human, and part of what connects me to others.

The challenge is finding ways to be present with those feelings without letting them take over my whole life or feeling personally responsible for fixing all the suffering in the world.

I also believe what's happening collectively is bigger than any one of us, and that some of the changes we're witnessing, including systems being dismantled, may be part of a larger unfolding. But I don't know that we're meant to simply sit back and let it happen. Maybe Spirit works through us, too—through our care, our voices, and the actions we take. Maybe getting involved is one way Spirit invites us to participate in change.

I think of the parable of the drowning man, who turns away people sent to rescue him because he believes God will save him, only to realize too late that they were the help he’d been praying for. Sometimes help comes in ways we don't expect, through the people and opportunities around us. We, too, have a part to play—not just in recognizing that help, but in responding to it.

I feel called to help in some way beyond the individual people I work with. I don't always know what that looks like. Sometimes it means speaking up. Sometimes it means supporting an organization, showing up in my community, or having a conversation. Sometimes it means taking care of myself so I can continue to be present for the people in my life and work.

I don't believe I need to respond to every issue, or be constantly informed about every painful thing happening. I have limits. I need rest. I need moments of joy and connection. I need to be able to return to myself.

And I also don't want my need for rest or spiritual peace to become an excuse for ignoring what's happening to other people.

What this balance looks like in my life

I'm learning that balance isn't a fixed place I arrive at. It's something I keep coming back to, and it can look different from one day to the next.

Some things that help me find my way back:

• Find a daily practice that connects you to your soul. For me, that might be walking in nature, meditating, journaling, sitting quietly, or opening my Akashic Records.

• Stay connected to your body and emotions. Our bodies offer signals about what we need and what we're experiencing, and can also be a source of spiritual messages and insight. Notice what you're feeling, listen with curiosity, and make space to express and move through difficult emotions.

• Find ways to release what you're carrying. When anger, grief, or pain builds up, I need practices that help me move through it without denying it or getting stuck in it.

• Make space for love, compassion, and gratitude. I want practices that help me connect with these qualities and bring them into the world. I don't think we should underestimate their value.

• Choose one or two causes that matter to you and find ways to get involved. You might volunteer, donate, attend events, have conversations, or speak up. Systems of oppression are connected, and struggles for justice often intersect. I may not post about every cause; much of the work for me happens beyond social media, and I don't have to make every action visible for it to matter.

• Set boundaries with news and social media. I want to stay informed without constantly absorbing breaking news and others' distress, while noticing how what I take in affects me emotionally and spiritually.

• Notice when you're getting pulled into rumination. When I've been sitting in intense emotions for too long, I want tools to help me return to myself—not to judge my feelings, but to care for myself.

These practices don't mean I always get it right. I still find myself ruminating, feeling overwhelmed, or unsure what to do at times. Sometimes I need to step back. Sometimes I need to take action. I'm learning to listen for what is needed in the moment.

Still finding my way

I keep coming back to the question of whether I can be spiritually grounded and connected, and still speak up about the world. I think I can. But I also think it takes intention.

I want to stay connected to my soul without turning away from my humanity. I want to care about the suffering around me without becoming consumed by it. I want to bring compassion into my work and my relationships, and I want that compassion to include people experiencing harm beyond the spaces I can personally reach.

Maybe spiritual connection isn't about rising above what's happening. Maybe, for me, it's about finding the steadiness to stay present with it—to feel, to care, to act when I can, and to return to myself when I need to.

I'm still learning how to do that. And maybe the balance isn't something I need to figure out once and for all. Maybe it’s a practice: staying connected to my soul while remaining present to the world around me.

If you’re looking for support as you navigate your own healing and spiritual connection, I’d love to work with you. Reach out to me or book a free consultation to explore how I can support you.