My Daughter Has Become My Greatest Teacher

I believe we have many teachers throughout our lives. Some are more formal, like educators who get up in front of a classroom. But there are many other teachers who show up in less formal ways. In fact, if we stay open, I think we can learn from any living being with a spirit—a person, an animal, a plant, a river, etc.

Staying open to this idea has helped me see that my daughter has become my greatest teacher.

I’m not talking about her caretaking me or us reversing roles. I’m talking about letting her be the kid and be herself, while allowing myself to witness life and relationships in a new way.

The thing about kids is that they are experiencing everything for the first time as this human self in this life. So they approach the world through what Zen Buddhism refers to as the beginner’s mind, which can be challenging as an adult. But for kids, it’s natural. They’re curious. They’re present. They’re aware. To see the world through a child’s eyes can open our minds. It can challenge assumptions and the rigid ways we have come to think about and see the world.

What’s especially interesting about babies and very young children is that they are untouched—or at least more untouched—by all the messaging and programming we internalize over time from our families, the people in our lives, society, and the media. We internalize things so early and so deeply that eventually we don’t even see them anymore. We just assume that’s the way things are.

It’s like when you travel to a new country with a culture different from what you’ve become accustomed to. Because everything is new, you notice things that might be completely commonplace to someone who has lived there their whole life. It’s harder to see what has become familiar to us.

So, in these ways, my two-month-old daughter is helping me see through new eyes at the age of 37. Here are a couple of things she has taught me so far.

The Power of the Breath

My daughter is constantly reminding me of how much we can feel other people’s energy. One day, I was holding her and trying to calm her down, but none of the usual tricks seemed to be working. I started to become stressed, and I’m pretty sure she could sense my distress. And, unsurprisingly, it wasn’t helping the situation.

Then suddenly, a thought popped into my head: take some deep breaths. Thanks, spirit guides, for the help. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing. When I opened them, she was calm. No more crying. No more wiggling around.

I was amazed at how effective it was. I thought maybe I had just gotten lucky that time. But when I found myself in a similar situation again, I remembered the deep breaths. I closed my eyes and focused on settling my body. And I could feel her calm down as I did.

It can be easy to forget the power of our breath. It’s so simple, yet so effective. And my daughter is my newest teacher on this truth.

The Importance of Being Present

It’s so easy in our fast-paced, capitalist world that demands so much from us to get caught up in multitasking. And the addictive qualities of social media and our phones make it easy to mindlessly scroll and hard to put our phones down. Sometimes, once my daughter is in her bouncy chair, I’ve noticed how easy it is to turn on the TV, pick up my phone, or start multitasking.

But my daughter has this way of making me realize pretty quickly when she’s lost my attention. There have been times when I didn’t even realize I had picked up my phone until she started making noises to get my attention back. And once I put my phone down, the joy and smile on her face when she gets my attention back just fill my heart.

She’s reminding me that when I’m present with her, I’m also more present with the world around me. She’s so naturally present, paying attention to everything around her because it’s all new. Slowing down to be in the moment with her helps me take in more of the world around me. I see more beauty. I notice more things. I feel more present. And in all of that, I feel more alive and joyful.

Now, the power of the breath and the importance of being present are both things we hear a lot about in our society, especially if you spend any time in spiritual or personal growth spaces. But it’s easy to forget what we know.

Sometimes a teacher doesn’t teach you anything new. Sometimes they remind you of what you already know and help you put it into practice so you can keep growing on your own. And maybe that’s one of the greatest gifts a teacher can offer us—not giving us something we didn’t already have, but helping us see what was there all along.

That’s also a big part of the work I do. I help people reconnect with the wisdom, intuition, and truth they already carry within themselves. If you’re ready to reconnect with yourself and what you already know, I’d love to work with you.